So, where do I start?
I’ve been massively uninspired to write recently. The harder I tried, the harder it became to find anything to want to type away about. It’s really weird feeling that way, when writing is an integral part of your day. So I stopped writing unless I felt I ‘needed’ to. Which I have to admit, hasn’t been much. I’ve been generally pretty uninspired in all areas. The Spiritual and human balance took a definite nose dive off a short cliff for a little while, I was unable (or unwilling) to see, hear or feel spirit at all, let alone want to write about anything. However, I’m pleased to say that I am back! It’s been returning slowly, and I’ve had a few channelled messages along with some wonderful inspiration from 2 of my guides. One of which I am going to talk about now.
My husband ran me a bath tonight. Candles, essential oils, steam and a willingness to dissolve myself into the water. To allow my aching, sore body to just relax! Well, something pretty wonderful happened. I finally relaxed the old noggin enough, to unblock what ever I had blocked. I had been thinking back over a conversation from today, with some friends about Mabon, the Pagan celebration of Autumn and Harvest. Suddenly an image popped into my minds eye of a profile picture I used on Facebook, this time last year. It was like a key opening a very large, very heavy door back, to my higher wisdom.
I realised that my guide Sila was with me and she had plenty to say, so I will try my best to order these in as best a way, as I can.
I had a sudden realisation. That profile picture depicts her energy perfectly. I realised that she stepped forward at around this time last year, the beginning of Autumn. That she has been guiding me for the past year and I hadn’t even clicked. I knew she had stepped forward to help guide me, regarding the shadow self but it is so much more than that. I now understand what Autumn is to me. And it’s relation to my journey. I am the Autumn!
In the spring we set about waking ourselves up. New life springs forward and we sow the seeds and nurture the ground, creating the right circumstances for our crops to grow and flourish. We are attentive and caring and delicately work our way around, ensuring we get the best crops we can. The best growth. The most successful harvest due to the work, care and love we put in over the long haul!
Before you know it, it’s time to harvest all that beautiful growth. To reap the benefits of the effort, time and energy put in. That time is now. Sila came to me in the Autumn and I am now finally ready to understand the reason for that. I have been growing. I have been creating the right circumstances for my growth. Sowing the seeds, seeking the knowledge and taking the care and attention needed to ensure I can be the best I can be.
Everything works in a cycle. Introspection and harvesting the hard work, follows growth and development. I haven’t been uninspired. I’ve been inwardly processing what I’ve achieved. Where I am at & where I will need to be by spring to start all over again. It is all just as it should be. Now is the time to share the harvest! Share the knowledge and experience and gain understanding from it. How beautiful is that.
The other thing we discussed this evening was Ego. Now. So many people have ego pretty confused. Many see it as a thing that needs to be tamed and blocked. It is NOT.
Imagine ego as the devil and the angel on each shoulder. We presume that the angel is the good one and the devil is bad right? Wrong. Both are good and bad in equal measure. Ego is not something that should be swallowed back down, nor is it some thing that should be listened to when that little voice inside speaks badly of you.
Everything has its place and everything has its balance. The angel who sits on your shoulder saying ‘you are amazing, don’t listen to them, you are fantastic, you can’t do anything to better yourself’ is no better than the devil who sits there saying ‘you’re not good enough, they think you’re rubbish, don’t speak your truth, you can never achieve what you wish’
They need each other to maintain balance and your objective is to learn how to harness both energies and harmonise/align your self with that.
People so often do something amazing and a real personal best for them (so far!) And instead of celebrating their achievement, they wish to immediately swallow that back down, for fear of ‘letting ego win’ There is a difference between celebrating your achievements and having pride in yourself, and becoming egotistical in how you put yourself into the world. The very fact that you have surprised yourself tells you that you have done something you didn’t realise you could do. That little spark is recognition of how far you have come. Don’t dampened that back down!! By doing so, you only serve to dampen your flame, Your personal power. Sit in that power and KNOW you did fantastically. Not in comparison to any other. But in comparison to the you, from yesterday.
You may have a friend you wish to share that achievement with. Do so! But do not dare then ruin it by shying away from accepting that they see that brilliance within you too.
The difference between ego and ego is all about how you see your achievements and failures (or feedback as I like to call it)
Do you go shouting from the rooftops how wonderful you are? Do you require that outside validation to ensure you know how good you are at something? Do you blame outside forces for your failures? Or do you share your achievements with a chosen few? Do you accept a compliment because you KNOW you genuinely deserve it? Do you accept failures as feedback to learn and grow from?
There’s a fine line between the two faces of ego.
There is a fine line between being humble and being full of self deprecation.
There is a fine line between pride in oneself and becoming conceited.
Celebrate your achievements. Learn from your lessons. Sow the seeds, grow the crops, harvest them and most importantly, share!!
I am amazing at what I do and I know I am. I am proud to be able to write these posts and share my ramblings with others. I am not concerned with whether others do it better, as there is only one of me. There is not one single human being out there, who is like me and therefore it is not possible to compare me to another. Stop wasting your energy on NOT sitting in your own awesome power of where you are right now!! Maybe invest that energy in being more loving. More caring. More kind. To the most important person in your life- yes I do mean yourself!
I know this is a very excitable, all over the place kind of post tonight, but I also know that it needed to be written exactly as it is, in all its confused and wild, chaotic energy. I don’t apologise for it, I merely ask that you appreciate how exciting it is to feel inspired again! Much has been missed out of the post and I am trusting that what has needed to be spoken of, has been.
Massive love xxx