Last night I attended a spiritual evening, which I try to do as often as I can.
I love catching up with everyone at the centre I attend, I’ve been struggling to get to events recently due to a foot injury and my husbands shifts, so it was really lovely to get to go.
I massively enjoy watching other mediums work and as I had been attending regularly, the normal high energy no longer affected me in ways it used to. I don’t get the whoosh of energy or the headaches and dizzy spells that used to come with being in a hall full of people in the physical and all their friends and family from spirit.
You see, Almost everyone hopes for a message at these events so the vibe is often high spirited, from both worlds!
But with help and guidance, I manage my abilities well, letting spirit know I’m here to watch not work, ensuring they know to go to the medium to pass their messages along if they do happen to give me a nudge.
I received a message from a family member, which the medium gave with love and great evidence. I hadn’t been expecting a message so again, that was lovely!! However, what happened just after my message is what surprised me.
Originally the medium felt she may have had my father and this soon was sorted out to be my grandfather instead. Happens all the time and no fault to the medium, she did really well deciphering my large spirit family! Bless them.
But just as the message ended and the lovely lady had moved on to another message, I felt an overwhelming pain. Extremely uncomfortable pain in the back of my head and my eyes. I suffer migraines but this pain? This was spiritside and didn’t belong to me.
To go back a little, my first experiences with spirit were all ailments. Painful and acute ailments that the person would have suffered before passing. I know now of course that this is one of the ways spirit can communicate, but at the time ? It was scary and I instantly asked them to not do that! I blocked it without realising and after a little while I stopped being able to feel their energy and ailments at all. That information became a ‘knowing’ instead.
So given the past, this pain was quite unexpected. It was so intense that I felt I may need to leave the room but the medium was speaking to someone behind me and I wouldn’t have been able to get up and sneak out. Then I suddenly heard a voice in my ear.
‘She has nae got me’ I could hear the cheeky smirk in the voice….and I realised right then, that the person speaking to me was my dad. I haven’t heard his voice for 20 years but I recognised it instantly.
I’ve had various forms of communication with my dad on this journey, but mainly from others passing messages along or what I like to call ‘imaginings’ in my head. This was something very different. This was my dad speaking to me with his voice. Completely natural and amusing with his Scottish accent. He had been confirming in his amused way, that the medium had spoken to Grandad rather than him earlier. Our loved ones never do lose their sense of humours!
It wasn’t long before I remembered that the pain I was feeling has been described to me many times before. These were the ailments my father would come through with, to other mediums when asked about how he came to pass.
As you can imagine, it’s quite difficult feeling some one else’s pain, but at the same time, you know that these are just ways that spirit confirm who they are to their loved ones. They no longer feel that. It’s like an energetic memory print for confirmation. But when you feel that pain and it’s associated to someone you love? Wow. Totally different.
I hadnt understood why spirit would give me these conditions before. But yesterday I finally got it. I am all about the evidence. I feel so much that I want to prove without a doubt that I have someone’s loved one with me, that the love and message can get a little lost. It’s important to be evidential but there must be a balance.
That man, who gave me those pains and emotions that came with it, That was my father, the pain he suffered was very real before passing and that upsets me. It upsets me to know he felt that, but it upsets me so much, because of course, I am deeply linked to him.
If I had been given those ailments previously for another person in spirit, a stranger- I likely wouldn’t have even connected the pain and grief and emotions that I felt last night to them, or their family. Those ailments to me were merely evidence. Proof that they are there.
Dont misunderstand, I am a deeply empathic person. I am sensitive and emotional and I feel everything very deeply. But I was detached from this simple truth. That those in spirit truly are right there. Its not my imagination. Its not me making it up. I’m not crazy (as some I’m sure think us learning mediums are) They are as real as the person next to me. They are as real as my dad was and still is today. They each, are someones mother, father, family or friends. Each with their own pains from the physical, each with their emotions and love and beauty and each deserve the same deep connection I felt to my father, when conveying their presence to loved ones.
The deeper understanding I gained last night was needed. A new found, deeper trust in my work. Stronger sympathy and empathy. Spirit are not just wanting to prove their existence and confirm that we do not cease to exist. No. Spirit wish to be heard and loved and remembered and honoured.
I will carry that lesson forward with me. It’s certainly not one I will be forgetting in a hurry! I am honestly still a little shocked how deeply this rocked me, but I am also extremely blessed to have been able to hear my dad’s amazing voice again.
New growth can be painful and releasing and exciting and scary. But as I peel open another layer, I gain further understanding and knowledge in how I can best serve the spirit world and all those who wish to know about it.
Cheers dad…Next time you decide on a lesson, maybe somewhere more private? Haha. Jokes aside. The lesson came exactly when needed. As always. Thankyou.